Time and Place. 1967, Northeast Thialand.
I was in an Army ambulance travelling with a medic from Camp Ram Chit Chi to N.K.P. on the Laosian-Thai
boarder, when sudden'ly we saw a young frail young woman bending over in pain on the side of a road. She
just broke her water.
After the nessecities were done in preparation, and placing her confortably in the back of the ambulance,
three hour hence passed, then, the child started to crown. Then with my cleansed hands, the medic told me to
get ready to hold this new life. The next minuet I had this wonderful little form of a girl in my hands.
Her eyes were closed, none the less, she was for the first time streching out to explored the new world
she has come into. Her arms were attempting to straighten and then, all of a sudden, her hand caught my pinky.
She clasped it tender'ly and then openned her eyes, and saw mine, as she squized.
Then it happened.
The great emotional insight.
The rush of emotion, and some innate force emerged from within me, and my entire world changed forever.
What this incident did, or told me, even though I did not have the words, then, to explain it, is that within our
male character our ego support structures to both our personality and sexuality were gentle in it's pathogenisis.
I could not fully exaimine my emotions, then, I was in the Army, and we, Americans, were at war.
The bloody vietnam War. None the less, it did point me into a new direction. One which eclispe what could have
been a normal life for me, but because of the imprint of this incident along, I could never abandone the direction it told
me to take. This is what others would call destiny. Rather dramatic, but none the less, it was always there.
Lastly, it was not until I ran into Dr. Sarah Slavin, Program Director, Women Studies, State University
College at Buffalo, in taking courses in her program that I was able to find the critical vocabulary needed to articulate
what for most males is not talked about or even expressed within the Infra-male culture.
I came face to face with the conclusion that our emerging society was becoming too